NEW FEATURE: C'Mon Attractions - Big Mamas' Number Four Vanishing Street

Hey everyone, and welcome to C'Mon Trailers. a new feature I'm starting to augment Buggin' On Shorts. The way I see it lots of folks post trailers of films they want to see and talk about how much they anticipate seeing the film. As for me, I like to be contrary. So C'Mon Trailers isn't about what I want to see, but rather a rather suspect collection of coming attractions. That being said is there anyplace better to start than Big Mamas: Like Father, Like Son?

First off, I had no idea there was a Big Mama sequel on the horizon, not that I keep up with it, but despite a thirty percent drop off between Big Mama's House and its sequel, somehow this still got made. I've always thought the Big Mama movies (apart from being stupid and offensive on so many levels) were the product of someone wanting to figure out how to get in on that Madea money. Say what you will about Tyler Perry, but he came up the hard way, learned his audience, perfected his craft on stage, and makes tons of bank now cause of it. Should Perry be worried because Martin Lawrence (star of gems like What's the Worst that Could Happen? and Black Knight) has paired up with Brandon T. Jackson (Alpa Chino in Tropic Thunder) for another round of Big Mama-ing. I think not because this time Lawrence is doing bad all by himself.

Next up, I Am Number Four.....

So I can stay one step ahead of snarky movie reviewers, let me go ahead and say don't call your film I Am Number Four unless you want people to say, "Well, it sure looks like Number 2." Director D.J. Caruso started off his screen career with The Salton Sea, a fine film that features a freakily nose-less Vincent D'Onofrio, but then he went right downhill. Following up Salton with Eagle Eye and Disturbia  is quite a drop in quality if you ask me, and Number Four looks a lot like Push crossed with The Most Dangerous Game. At least this time Shia LaBeouf is absent, but in his place is Alex Pettyfer, the star of the 2006 tween spy film Alex Rider: Operation Stormbringer, so it's not like there's been a big improvement in leading men. Also on hand is Timothy Olyphant who stepped into his role when District 9's Sharto Copley dropped out, and I can tell you one thing. No matter how big the check was, I don't see this being Justified on Olyphant's part.

Moving on, our last trailer is for Vanishing on 7th Street.....

I'll admit that there's a chance I'm selling this movie short, but the only thing that makes me consider that is director Brad Anderson's output thus far. When you make Session 9, Transiberian, and The Machinist, you get a little slack in my book. However when you cast Dork Vader Hayden Christensen in your lead role and make a movie that looks like it's riffing on everything from Darkness Falls to I Am Legend, the rope gets a little tighter. I don't know if Anderson is trying to take a shot at the mainstream, but he needs to go back to what he's good at, crafting tense thrillers for a genre audience. While in the fim the population of Earth seems to have vanished in an instant, I predict that Vanishing on 7th Street will disappear from the theaters at much the same rate. 

Well that's it for this first installment of C'Mon Attactions. Hope you enjoyed it. You folks should c'mon back this weekend for a fine slice of horror, and then on Monday you can look forward to my next installment of The King of Wilmington


  1. Good stuff man! I never knew there was a second Big Mama's House either. Was it titled Bigger and Mommier? That's a lame joke, sorry.

    Also, love The Salton Sea.

  2. I saw the first two Big Momma's (hides), but I never actually made it through the second. When I saw the poster hanging in my local theater, I was in utter disbelief. I don't think anyone asked for it.

    And why is Hayden still getting work? Anakin or not, he is terrible.


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