Sometimes a Title Says it All

In Hollywood, you have those legacy families. There's the Sheens, the Fondas, the two Afflecks (cause we all needed two Afflecks), and then there's the Arquettes. Rosanna I always liked in Desperately Seeking Susan, and Patricia who's turn as Alabama Whirley in True Romance will always make her one of my dream girls. Then there's David. Well, he was in Scream and he married Courtney Cox, but he really redeemed himself to me when he directed The Tripper last year, a classic film. There's still one more acting Arquette out there, and that's Alexis (born Robert) Arquette, and if you haven't ever seen her act, you're missing something.

Killer Drag Queens on Dope (2004) starring Eva Destruction (Alexis Arquette), Omar Alexis, Mario Diaz, and Don Edmonds. Directed by Lazar Saric.

From the first scene where Ginger (Alexis) and CoCo (Omar Alexis) tie a guy down to a bed and Ginger sits on his face to kill him you can tell what you're in for, and its a wild ride. We follow the adventures of the two assassin drag queens as they carry out hits that had been assigned to Ginger's boyfriend Bobby (Mario Diaz). He works for Uncle A, a mobster getting up in years obsessed with knocking off all his partners in crime. (Uncle A is played by Don Edmonds who is a legendary cult director in his own right with the exploitation classic Ilsa, She Devil of the SS. )

The drag queens perform all the killings with their own particular finesse. When Ginger dresses up as a nun to off one guy, the ensuing car chase ends up with nice surprise and makes you wonder how fast drag queens can get around in heels. Ginger is doing these jobs so she can get up enough money for a sex change to make Bobby happy, but Coco is not so happy about that idea. Coco is a Lovely Linda doll collector, and she acts out her life though the dolls and longs to get them designer one of a kind clothes. However, what she wants most if to go to Virgina Beach with Ginger and without Bobby. The girls share a close friendship and they share their dope. What kind of dope you might ask. What kind you got. The girls shoot heroin, smoke weed, and go on an acid trip that looks like a rave threw up all over it.

Naturally, things start to go wrong as Coco gets distracted my their mark, a cut rate Desi Arnez type, and lets him get away. Soon Uncle A knows women have been carrying out his hits and the girls are on the run. More fun and freakishness ensues over a New Wave Lovely Linda Doll, Uncle A's moronic goons ("I'll never understand why a beautiful girl like that want to go out and get a dick?"), and a handcrafted blow dart gun with poison made with love. That's not to mention the sword fight with the rival assassin Mr. Fly, the brawl while on acid, or the random craziness that follows them around.

This movie is so much fun to watch and I can't recommend it enough, but I do warn you not to expect too much. There's plenty of funny lines and some killer performances. Everyone in it sells their roles to a T, but the movie is made for a dime so don't expect production values or special effects. They could only afford two special effects, and their names are Ginger and Coco. That's all you need.

Bug Rating 

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